After the Lights Go Out...

PA SYSTEM: May I have your attention please. The library will be closing in 5 minutes. Please take any books and other materials to the checkout desk now. Again, the library will close in 5 minutes.

YOUNG CHILD: Whaaaaaaahhhhhh! I don't wanna go!

MOM: But honey, the library is closing. And if you don't leave, the library monsters will eat you.

OK, so I've never head a mom tell their two year old that a library monster will eat them, but parents do tell their kids some weird stuff to get them to leave.... Like the mom that said we would lock the kids in and not let them leave until morning... which actually made the child want to stay even longer.

So.... What really happens when libraries close for the night?

Unfortunately, childrens and teen librarians at 
Oshawa Public Libraries let out secrets slip.  Evil Canadian librarians!

The Insulting Librarian

We've all had those patrons at whom we've wanted to scream "WTH?!?!?!" Come on. You can admit it. I won't tell anyone. PROMISE.


Some of us even have little homemade voodoo dolls... and an extra stash of stick pins at our desks.... Not that we've ever used them or anything... but.... Well... ok... may once... or twice....


Anyway, we've all met the patrons who have had enough, but what do you think happens when it's the librarian who has no constructive release of bad energy? like my voodoo doll....

Idea : How to Get Teens Into the Library

Known Fact: Libraries struggle to get teens into the library. I have tried my best to bring in the masses with Summer Reading Dances, pet rock training schools, and good old fashioned bribery, but it's just too hard to compete the the average teen's busy life style....

Or it WAS....

I found the solution. No need to thank me. Ok, if you REALLY want to, do so by nominating ME for the I LOVE MY LIBRARIAN AWARD. No pressure.... Have you started the application process yet? **sigh**


 Oh yeah..... Solution. Wait for it.... 

Wait for it....

Library Flash Mob Dance Parties!  **wild applause**

Did I hear skepticism in your applause? You don't quite believe it will bring teens in en mass?  **sigh** Skeptics. Just check out what happened at the Seattle Public Library earlier this summer.....
  


Told ya so!

Oh, Melissaaaaaaaa!!!!

The Power of Twitter

Librarian Andy Woodworth tweeted

ATTN LIBRARIAN TWEEPS: Need help getting @oldspice guy to say a few words regarding libraries. RT plz. Thanks.

Wanna know what happened???

Come on.

Guess.

Give up yet?

Hmmm....  I need this power o' the tweet.


MAYBE if I tweeted...

@The_Pigeon : Plz visit. Will let you drive bus. Promise.

 Anyone think it will work?

If Librarians Had Super Powers

If you could have a superpower, what would it be? from Library Beat on Vimeo.

What would happen if librarians could have a super power? Think they would use it for good?

Librarians at NSLS were asked just that. What super power would you have??? Answers run the gambit from flying to invisibility to "brewing coffee in my mouth." Anyone think Greg has a twin in Illinois? Kinda scary thought, I know.

 

Well, I already know what my superhero costume would look like. We all know how super fly I look in my pink feather wig, lipstick face mask, and Super Grover Super Fly tee. 

But as far as super POWERS???

• Turn into Fancy Nancy at will....
• Convince Sarah that yes, we really DO need to have the Pigeon Party come to town and perform "Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus" just for me... and have Mo in the audience... and then the audience would BEG me to do my rendition of DLTPDTB... and then I would get standing ovations... and Hollywood contracts... and Mo would dedicate his next Pigeon book to me.... Mo Willems adores me. It's TRUE, I tell you. A person can't just make this stuff up....
• Be awarded the I LOVE MY LIBRARIAN award due to thousands of patrons nominating me as the greatest library lady... ever.
• Oh, yeah, and world peace.

Oooohhhh, then I could get me own action figure....

Would anyone else care to share their own coveted super power?

Can You Help Me Now?

I've gotten calls from several states away before..., but from the half way around the world???


Glad to know librarians have my back in case the need arises....

PROTEST: Library Commercial SANS Moi

I am OFFICIALLY jealous! 




I am DENIED my inalienable right to star in a silly library commercial... and then they put a serious one up on YouTube.  **sigh**   I'm feeling a little unloved here people. A little unloved.

Does anyone else have flashbacks of Pigeon upon seeing Hilary behind the wheel???

My ONLY consolation.... At the time of this posting, MY library YouTube video has more viewings than Jr. Now I'm SURE that if a certain library director would have asked me to do the Banana Chant while wearing a pink boa in the Jr. video, it would have gone viral by now.  **grumbles**  

Maybe next time, they'll learn. 

Summer Reading Silly Library Commercial

Cincinnati claims to have the busiest public library in the whole nation.  True, they are in a fairly large town, but I chose to believe it is because they rock their silly library commercials.  
  

Silly library commercials=more patrons through the door.  

Just another reason why my great and darling director should make full use of my talents.  **hint, hint, hint**

 

My Dearest of Blog Readers

You may remember a recent blog post where a certain Brandy proclaimed my excellence and named me, **tear** yes, ME dear readers, a ROCK STAR! Of course, I humbly acknowledge this as fact.

A few days ago, Brandy again reached out and asked that I use my Super Rock Star status for the good of librarians everywhere. She pleaded that I find at least 3 library related sites that can help them, too, try and achieve my level of greatness. I spent HOURS searching the web over for the best of the best to help my para and pro colleagues in their hour of need.  For easiest of access, please remember to add each of these sites to your RSS Reader.  From them, you shall gain more leanring than all of your years combined of library science classes. 

If colleagues proclaim shock upon you cracking more than one joke per week, proceed to check out Dewey's pearls of wisdom IMMEDIATELY.  This teen services librarian shows the lighter side of the library world.

Are you stuck in a fashion rut?  Is your closet filled with old cardigans and tasselled loafers?  Do people know that you're a librarian without even asking?  If so, check out The Lipstick Librarian.  This library fashionista is sure to change yoru wardrobe right around!  In case of Library Fashion Emergency, please read the TIPS section for a quick fashion fix.


My dearest of blog readers, you all know it is my heart's desire to star in a  silly library commercial.  Maybe... just maybe... one day, @ Your Library will spotlight me in their blog. Each Friday, they show off a few library videos from around the world.  They also do other things, but I know this is what YOU would find most important of all.


Want to have an action figure in your very own image???  Follow the Great Nancy Pearl, and MAYBE she will give you tips and hints on how she did it.  Her action figure and the Super Chriss Super Hero figure will soon be doing their own silly library commercial.  Stay tuned for details.

Now my dearest of readers, I know that there are MANY more librarian blogs and sites of note out in the world.  As I was doing my HOURS of research JUST FOR YOU(!!!), I kept careful note of each one and compiled an exhausted list of all of them that had been updated at least once within the last 9 months.  I will update it as I find more.  Enjoy...  Librarian Blogs.

Library Dance Videos???

First Betty Glover gave us her infamous library workout video.  But now librarians from Worthington, OH, are trying to teach us how to dance to Michael Jackson songs???  I think we can pass on trying to recreate this "masterpiece."  Stephens College may laugh us out of town if we tried..., but it is good for a laugh or two.

Cavemen at the Library

Apparently even cavemen knew to ask a librarian when they had a question....



Wonder if the commercial will now say "Ask a Librarian.  So easy even a caveman can do it."  **snicker**

Nancy Pearl's My Hero

I love Nancy Pearl. I've only read a few chapters of Book Lust. I typically don't read articles about her. I've never heard her speak. BUT I idolize her. WHY? She has her own action figure!  Who wouldn't like that?

So over the last few days, I've been writing out my New Year's resolution. The list includes writing a certain number of articles for eHow and lenses on Squidoo, keeping up with my blog posts, getting the starring role in a silly library commercial and getting my own Super Chriss action figure. In my head, it looks like what I wore for the Superhero Dress Up Day.... You know....The day that Marlene and I dressed up as superheroes United Way fundraiser..., and patrons kept looking at me weirdly. (Ok, the always look at me weirdly, but you know... pink feather wig, black cape, tulle skirt, superhero mask, pink Super Fly Grover tee.)

So going back to my idolization of Nancy Pearl and thus my desire for my own action figure.... In my head, I play "Nancy Pearl" like most little kids play Barbie. "Nancy Pearl vs the Loud Teenagers." "Nancy Pearl Ssshhhh's Palin." (Nancy NEVER would have stood up to a certain grouchy ex-Governor and refused to weed out "controversial" books. She would have stood up in that meeting and given a great big "Shhhhhhhh!")

Maybe when I get my action figure, Superhero Chriss and Nancy Pearl can star in a silly library commercial TOGETHER. **sigh** I dream BIG.

QUIZ: Anyone know the other (fictional) librarian that has her own action figure?  Click here for the answer....

Librarian on the Edge

"The Dewey Decimal System is a truly practical and efficient system... like Google for smart people."

Google Produces a Library Commercial

This would be an example of a library commercial in which I do NOT want to star. It's boring and involves no pink feather boas. **sigh** It was produced to promote Google Librarian Central. Since the last update was over a year ago and the one before that was Summer 2007, I guess it didn't do a very good job of promoting the site. I bet they're thinking, "If only Chriss and Esme had starred in the Google library commercial, it would have gone viral...." Of course they would have been right. I bet they'll ask us for the next filming....

From Across the Pond

Americans aren't the only ones who adore silly library commercials. Jon Mason introduces us to to England's own University of Plymouth library.

Things I learned about British libraries:

• Navel officers run rampant in the stacks.
• Wikipedia now contains "100% fact."
• They're the best place to find DVDs.
• Hamburgers are now the official icons for Macs.
• Oversized books are really meant to be used as workout equipment... just like Betty Glover says.
  
• Jon Mason is "devishly handsome." He told me so.

Library Infomercial

@ Your Library named this library infomercial as the BEST library commercial on YouTube. Created by a patron for a library video contest at Berlin-Peck Memorial Library in CT, this amateur video maker beat out professionally made commercials like those created for San Francisco. (His French **cough cough** accent shows he has had a major Quebec influence, but we won't fault him for that.)

Psst! Melissa! SoBoCo has a lot of Lego's for one of their programs.... PR has a video camera..... **hint, hint**

One on One Library Tours

Since Judy P. always teases me about giving soooo much info, I think this video would be PERFECT for me to star in when we do our library commercial. Of course, I would be required to wear a pink boa... and exchange the coffee for a Dr. Pepper... or maybe a strawberry smoothie from Café Mozaki.... Yum, I love their strawberry smoothies and plain glazed donuts.... Wait.... Sorry. Back to the library commercial. I will play the part of the tour guide. Any volunteers for the confused library patron???

Oh, and Esmé says she will play the part of the Reading to Rover dog. Then she demanded a new outfit for her starring role. Silly puppy.

Library Dance Party

I think everyone has gotten that the main purpose of my blog (aside from homework of course) is to get Melissa to let me star in a silly library commercial. (Hello! Who wouldn't want to be a rock star library super star?!?!?!?) I've worked very hard to find the best super rock star silly library commercials that could easily star ME and in the process become addicted to YouTube. So for my "homework," I decided to check out their competition. I'm sure that no one's shocked that YouTube got 1st place. (Duh!) 2nd place went to BBC iPlayer and 3rd to MetaCafe.

I was HIGHLY disappointed in MetaCafe. They are riddled with ad landmines and every other video started with a 15-30 sec commercial. If I wanted that, I would watch more tv. Plus, their quality is far inferior to my beloved YouTube. Most of the videos appear severely depixilated when comparing them to one's posted elsewhere. Don't believe me? Check out Library Dance Party by Supermac18 on both channels. Both were submitted by the original artist, so in theory, they should be of the same quality. Guess again....




Library Dance Party - Amazing videos are here

As far as the BBC iPlayer goes, they disallow their tv show videos to be played outside of the UK. **sigh** I was excited to be able to watch some of my favorite silly BBC shows in their native language, but it wasn't to be. (Anyone who thinks Americans and Brits speak the same language has never been spent real time with real Londoners. Every time I talked to a non-tourist worker, I had to ask them to repeat themselves at least 3 times. "Take away" still cracks me up. **grin**)

Other video database sites:
eHow videos (They recently bought Expert Village.)
Vimeo
Revver
Howcast
Aniboom
Godtube (Christian only)
MySpaceTV Videos
Veoh
Hulu (watch TV shows, movie reviews and trailors, and more... also searches ABC, NBC, Fox, etc. videos)

Seem a little overwhelming? Go to Google Video, and they will search most of the video sites... and a few more than I have listed. Who doesn't love Google?

So that we can stick with the true purpose of this blog, Melissa, I think I can dance just as well as Supermac18... though I would prefer to change the song. This one (while funny), doesn't really work with my personality as well as most silly songs....

The Library Minute

Arizona State University's library has the library minute. It introduces library services in a fun (and silly) way. Note information on zombies, discouraging forklifts, Spam: everyone's favorite meat in a can, and their library goon squad.

How DBRL could put their own special spin on the Library Minute..... Esme is dressed up in a pink boa and librarian costume. (Yes, I had to throw in the pink boa.) Then we could call it "Library Minute with the Puppy Fashionista." Great idea. I know. I've got several more. Stay tuned.

Teen Makes Library Commercial

Apparently silly library commercials are so cool, that other people besides silly librarians are making them. Check out this teen's commercial for the Eden Public Library. We learn that lions and tigers do NOT run wild there..., but Darth Vador may show up.


AGAIN, I note that Esme and I are both ready, willing, and available to star in silly library commercials.